Mark's girlfriend Ann, who we called Patricia, visited us often. Mark had chosen Elizabeth instead, but continued to see Patricia from time to time. Her heart was broken, and she called Mom (we now had a phone) and talked for hours, crying on her end. Mom prayed for advice from Yahweh, and told her that she would get her man, she had to be patient and have faith. In time, he would come around and see that she was his true love. Patricia came over for weekends sometimes and pitched right in with the chores. She never complained about our living conditions or acted as though she was better than us.

Elizabeth, on the other hand....well, when she came, it was pretty awful. We would spend a day or two cleaning beforehand, and no matter how hard we worked, there was only so much we could do for the place. Even then, she acted as though she might catch a disease simply from being in the house. It was obvious that she really did not want to be there. It was hard for us to like her, especially when we knew how devastated Patricia was over this snobby woman who had stolen Mark from her. What was worse, Elizabeth didn't act as though she loved Mark. She acted like he made her feel safe, like she was his companion, like she owned him, but not as though he were the center of her heart. Patricia did. She would have died for Mark in a heartbeat, and we all knew it.

I watched these things unfold before my eyes and watched in horror and dread. I hoped with all my heart that nothing like this would ever, ever happen to me, and I was terrified that it might. I didn't know if, faced with the kind of wrenching agony Patricia was going through, I'd be able to keep putting myself on the line like she did, keep hoping. When she was with Mark, you couldn't tell that anything was the matter. She simply looked delighted with every single second she spent with him. She was warm and affectionate, not standoffish and cold. We wondered why on earth he would make this choice, how he could do it to her, and how she could possibly take it.

You might wonder why we supported Patricia in her persistent affection for a man who had clearly chosen the other woman. The answer is simple: our family believed in polygamy. Yahweh had spelled it out for us some time ago:

•Sex= marriage. The first person you had sex with would be your husband or wife, whether you loved them or not, whether you ever saw them again or not.

•A woman could only have one husband, but a man could have lots of wives. Every single woman a man slept with was his wife.

•A woman could only get divorced in the case of adultery.

•In other words, if the two separated and she could hold out until he went and had sex first, then she could remarry guiltlessly. Otherwise, she was an adulteress.

•You have to be really careful who you have sex with, because you are stuck with them, forever. Even if you didn't want to have sex with them.

•Marriage licenses and ceremonies were all a mark of the Beast. All that mattered was if you were married in Yahweh's eyes.

•Families should be involved in selecting the proper mates for their children. Yahweh will tell them who the right one is. The young man or womman should await their true love and future mate rather than going out looking or dating.

•There is one, and only one, right man for every girl or woman. And if she doesn't find him and keep him, she will never, ever, be truly happy with anyone else. If he dies, she has lost her one and only true love.